Learning to fail safely

I am so grateful to have the opportunity to advise college students. This is all I've wanted to do since going back to SNHU and seeing my advisors and mentors treat me upon coming back: open arms, no judgement, comfortable. It meant the world to me. When I was coming to see my mentor, Ashley, for the first time since coming back, I was petrified.

I was embarrassed for doing so poorly in school, and even more embarrassed to face the person I was actively avoiding before I left SNHU.

I remember it so clear. It was a meeting for Second Start, a program designed to help students succeed coming back from academic suspension/probation. Ashley looked at her caseload of students including me, and said, "Brianne, I'll get to you last."

God damn, she horrified me! I was so ashamed and scared and just had no idea what she was going to say.

When it was finally my time to meet with her, I broke down instantly. I couldn't believe I was back in the same office I was so afraid of three years prior.

We embraced. We both cried together. We caught up on our family lives and our professional lives. We made a plan to see each other again the following week. And since then, while at SNHU, I saw Ashley at least once a week every week for the last two and a half years. This is actually the longest I've gone since then without seeing her.

She taught me a lot about how to meet a person where they're at. She met me where I was. Because of her, I want to be as graceful as she was with me to other students. I want the students I work with to know that I am here for them at a distance. I cannot hold your hand, but I can help guide you to the path you want to take. I want the student to fail safely. I learned from my mistakes and failures with Ashley by my side. That's the role I want to take on. The role I know in my heart was made for me.